Disassociate

One more time.
Separate myself from reality.
No more pain sorrow anger painLove.
Nothing is there
In the depths of my mind.
numbness is required
Cold blank eyes.
Nothing.
Emotions only get in the way,
Trusting people only gets me burnedAgain.
I can't open up

Don't want to open up.
No ray of light must reach this closet
Expose these skeletons.
I'm halfway now,
Giving everyone one more chance
For humanity to prove itself
For love to be real

For you to reach me.

I don't want to retreat into the darkness
But I am deathly afraid of emotional pain.
You can't be hurt if you never love
You can't lose if you never hope.
I want to be secluded in the still corners of my mind.
I don't want to be alone.
I don't want to be hurt again.
I want to love.

I don't want to trust you.
I want to trust you.
I want you to love me.